Our lives have been lets just say quite busy and full with our new living situation. Coming home after a long day at school and daycare has proven to be a very difficult at times for the 2 of us. There is a lot more going on around here after school activities, homework, dinner, baths and just the kayos kids bring into the house. Annalise will list out what she wants on the way home in the car, chips, chocolate milk and Kai-lan. Then it continues all night long asking for things you would not necessarily give a child before dinner or bed. I have felt like a sucker at times giving in to her but not after reading this article It explains just how I feel and why I let her have things she probably should not have. I also try my best to just give her undivided attention so she is not seeking it by throwing herself on the ground, kicking and screaming to get what she wants. She still has a primal instance that she has to fight for everything. I too can do better at responding to her request in a more timely fashion but it just goes against the grain, everything I have been trained in behavior mod, "don't let them win." But this is totally different it's attachment and helping her feel safe and learn that I will be their for her and her every need. Asking to have ice cream for dinner is a lot more then just a special treat as parents and especially those parents of children that have been abandoned, we need to take a good look at the bigger picture.
1 comment:
Aloha there Paulette!
Oh if Starla could have been so lucky when Auntie Paulette watched her! Or was she???? Just a note to you on substituting food for love????
Read "Sugar Blues" and you might start to think of alternative ways to appease Annalise. Also try looking at Dr. Mercola's web site and try looking at what he has to say about sugar and many many other foods that we have all given to our children! It really makes you stop and think what are we really wanting our kids to know about the food that should be nourishing their bodies...it is us, the ones that were raised on sugary sweets all of our childhoods that think our children are "missing out" if we don't let them have these treats. Other than that from one single Mom that is pau raising her five to you that have just begun, just some words of wisdom. I love you and my hat is off to you for all of your dreams and accomplishments coming true! Just keep on loving that little girl!!! Well done Paulette!
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